The Human Race Is Doomed
In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed, here are some actual label instructions on consumers goods:
- On Sears hair dryer:
Do not use while sleeping.
- On a bag of Fritos:
You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.
- On a bar of Dial soap:
Directions: Use like regular soap
- Some Swann frozen dinners:
Serving Suggestion: Defrost
- On a hotel-provided shower cap in a box:
Fits one head
- On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert:
Do not turn upside down. (printed on the bottom of the box)
- On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:
Product will be hot after eating.
- On packaging for a Rowenta Iron:
Do not iron clothes on body.
- On Boot's Children's Cough Medicine:
Do not drive car or operate machinery.
- On Nytol (a sleep aid):
Warning: May cause drowsiness.
- On a Korean kitchen knife:
Warning keep out of children.
- On a string of Chinese made Christmas lights:
For indoor or outdoor use only.
- On a Japanese food processor:
Not to be used for the other use.
- On Sainsbury's Peanuts:
Warning contains nuts.
- On an American Airlines packet of nuts:
Instructions: open packet, eat nuts.
- On a Swedish chain saw:
Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands.
This page created and maintained by Chad Schultz, ©1999.
Last updated March 7, 1999.
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